Ever thought to yourself, "I don't know why I ate that triple cheeseburger -- it's as if I were possessed"? Well, the Devil does make you do it, according to an article in the Weekly World News, which reports on the latest diet craze in New Orleans: exorcism. Excommunicated Catholic priest Jon Shaunt charges obese patients $5,000 (US) to remove the demons who take possession of them and force them to binge. "I needed to exorcise -- not exercise," the paper quotes one satisfied customer as crowing after she lost 218 pounds. And there's more good diet news from the News. It might not be necessary to eat broccoli to lower the risk of heart disease. German doctor Franz Epping told the paper about a remarkable new study that finds that men who stare at large-breasted women daily are much less likely to have heart attacks. "There's no question: Gazing at large breasts makes men healthier. Our study indicates that engaging in this activity a few minutes daily cuts the risk of stroke and heart attack in half." He suggests that men "watch `jiggle' shows on TV, rent low-budget women-in-prison movies and peruse men's magazines such as Playboy as often as possible." No explanation is offered by Epping as to why the breasts must be "D-cup or greater." Does this mean that "Sorry baby, I had a prescription" could become the new defence for sexual harassment? And what will it mean for the health of rock star Tommy Lee, given Baywatch bombshell Pamela Anderson's well-publicized breast reduction? Not to mention the latest news. She's apparently taken herself out of Lee's sight completely and has reunited with her ex, 27-year-old surfer Kelly Slater. Pamela's in hiding with Slater, fearing Lee's well-known anger-management problems, the Globe reports. Let's hope her incognito status doesn't distract the latest workers for the U.S. military: bombshell-sniffing African killer bees. The Sun, with little concern for national security, has revealed that the dreaded killer bees will soon be employed to find hidden land mines. These war-loving bees are said to love land mines that way most bees love flowers. The only glitch is that en route to the mines they'll sting everything they encounter. Government scientists are considering small doses of tranquillizers for the angry but courageous bees. Miranda Purves, National Post

National Post, Tuesday, March 14, 2000